Man jokes
What do you call a man in love with an emo?
I really don't know.
I saw my midget neighbor at a bus stop.
"Jump in, I'll give you a lift home," I said.
"Bugger off!" he shouted back.
"What an ungrateful little man," I thought as I zipped up my backpack and continued my walk.
Your mom was so fat that she couldn't have a man and couldn't go through the door.
I'M JOKING, DON'T GET MAD!
I ate a man because he was dead!
Why do orphans like Spider-Man?
'Cause they really enjoy Far From Home and No Way Home. Damn, was he mad about Spider-Man Homecoming!
Memes
You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
What do you call a movie about an orphan?
The Bat Man.
A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.
The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”
Why was your mom so into me?
'Cause she was the man.
Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.
A man said his bars are lit. I said no, because mine are fire.
A man walks into an AA meeting and asks for a roadmap.
Q: Why do men say "ladies first?"
A: So they can look at their a**.
Police: Hey man, look at this! *throws cocaine at fan and it flew back into his face* Me: Are you okay? Police: Looks like I "crack"ed the case.
Why does Megan sound like a man, but she is a good singer and rapper, but then people talk about her? What's y'all rapper are singer?
They say that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but I find it a lot easier to go through the ribcage.
Man, everybody's birthday is this year! 🤦🏽♂️
Man, all these jokes suck. They're horri-puning.
Not a joke.
Any girls looking for a steamy hot man?
NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.
MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.