French

Anonymous

Why do the French eat snails? – They don’t like fast food.

8

Hell

Anonymous

A man is at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. A few years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?

1
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Paint

Tony

Why did the snail paint a big “S” on his car? Because he wanted people to say look at that S car go when he rolled by.

2

Puns

Derplaney

One day a snail got robbed by 2 turtles, once the cops arrived and asked what had happened, Snail said “I dont know it all happed to fast”!

4

Man

Saoirse Corin Conn

A man opened a snail farm.

He said that it is a slow moving business.

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Shell

Wolfy

What do you call a snail without a shell? Dead

1

French

Anonymous

Why do French like to eat snails so much?

They can’t stand fast food.

Street

AmIAJokeToYou??

A turtle was walking down the street when all of a sudden a snail came up to him and robbed him. When the policemen showed up and asked him what happened, he responded ‘’ I don’t know it all happened so fast’’.

Fast

Anonymous

A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”

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Hell

Anonymous

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: ‘What the hell was that all about?’

Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2015/11/26/the-ten-funniest-jokes-ever-according-to-science-5527698/?ito=cbshare

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MetroUK | Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MetroUK/

Fat

worst boy

tails. hey sonic do you need payback oh you are not a fat hedgehog you are a snail. sonic. but im a fat snail because dr eggman turned me to a snail. tails. i don,t trust you fat snail

Jesus

Anonymous

What was jesus scared of the most? sNAILS

Jesus

Anonymous

What was jesus’s favourite food? Answr: sNAILS

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Puns

Ninja

“Have You Ever Heard Of The Snail That Never Gives Charity?” “Yeah, He Is So Shellfish!”

Woman

Anonymous

One day a snail got robbed by two turtles. The cops arrived and arrested the woman for killing her cheating husband, and the son was sent to child services. (Moral - no one cares about the frkn snail and turtles)

Nut

Cassidee

Do you know how a snail has a “nail” why can’t it be a nut?

Forehead

Ronans Big Balls

Why is Ronan’s forehead the size of Jupiter? Because he dropped the TV on his forehead it also had rings

Why is Jupiter’s ring stuck in orbit? Because Ronan’s forehead kept it stuck in orbit

Snails are like sperm, slow and sloppy

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Street

That one person

A turtle was walking down the street when suddenly a snail came and robbed him. When the police came he asked what happened, the turtle responded ‘’ I don’t know, it all happened so fast’’.

Eating

anon

ok so, a mole goes up to a snail and eats him. it was a seven course meal if i say so myself

Legs

Marijuanamike69

Why do women have legs? Because they would leave snail tracks where ever they went.