There are some sounds that everyone loves…
- Shoes on gravel
- Crackling of fire
- The snapping necks of those who think they can disrespect you
- Cats purring
It’s funny how Stephen hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking but he can’t do any of those things
When you are suicidal comedic relief sometimes helps. These jokes sometimes help you realize how many more people feel the way you do and how ridiculous it sounds sometimes.
But joke time…
I’m giving in my two week resignation to life… it’s not you … it’s me!!!
Guy 1: P-gay or T-gay ?
Guy 2: P-gay sounds cooler
Guy 1: yeah me too i don’t like P-ewDiePie, always love T-series
Guy 2: omg what did i just say i wasn’t even knowing what were you talking about :<
Guy 1: like i do care :$
Guy 3: but i do care :<
Guy 1: fu*k you
Guy 3: do it
Guy 2: but you do care about me
Guy 3: no
Guy 2: fu*k you
Guy 3: do it
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
People with down syndrome have a specific skill only they have, they can give a blow job and talk to you while sounding exactly the same.
There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted Roblox. One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury. One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignore it and continued to play Roblox. Chris’s parents came and saw what had happened. The dad then yelled, “You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!” Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too.
So Jesus has been nailed to the cross. On the first day, he starts to moan, “Peter, Peter”.
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, “Peter, Peter”.
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, “Peter, Peter”.
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for, must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus, and says “Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important”?
Jesus- “Peter, I can see your house from here”.
Y don’t they let have Stephen Hawkings have other electronics around him ? Because he will sound staticky
One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house. I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: “Stop pirating video games.” Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.
Hey God what are you making?
Just a wooden stick that lights on fire
sounds like a match made in heaven