Location

Location jokes

Birth

1 view ·

Daughter: Where was I born?

Dad: Alabama.

Daughter: That is nice.

Mum: We have never been to Alabama.

Dad: RUN!

Town

3 views ·

What do you call it when a town on the south coast of England sprouts legs and starts walking around the country?

A walkie-Torquay.

Face

7 views ·

What do you call a person with no arms or legs lying face first in a river? Bob.

What do you call two people with no arms or legs standing in front of a window? Curt and Rod.

Dad

164 views ·

So my dad walks into a bar and there was a hooker and a child. I was with him and they both approached us and they said only £50 for head but it was a little weird that the child was talking to my dad and the hooker was talking to me. I was about to say something but my dad pushed me over and my friend's uncle killed my dad.

The kid was never seen again. Her name was Madeleine McCann. I think I'm the only one who knows where she is, but overall the head from the hooker was good.

Mama

2 views ·

Yo mama so far that when she walks outside at 8 a.m., it becomes midnight all over again.

Cannibal

10 views ·

There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to bury them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but the second guy refuses the meal.

When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.

In heaven, an angel asks him why.

“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat, though.”

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  • Rapper

    2 views ·

    Why did the rapper bring a map to the studio?

    To find his way through the BEATS.

    Incest

    49 views ·

    If you've spent less time inside your mother than your father has, you just might be from Alabama!