Location jokes
A dad and his son walk out to the middle of the woods armed only with a shovel and a lantern.
Son: "Dad, it's creepy out here!"
Dad: "You're complaining? I'm the one that has to leave the woods alone!"
A guy in a Costco was pretty pissed off at something. A guy walks up to him and says, "What's wrong, pal? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned aisle!"
I did a walk walk and walk walk home and walk walk home from school and walk walk home.
What has four legs and an arm?
A Doberman in a playground.
If you are wondering where the dog went, I don't know. Maybe he went barking around.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay person's house!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
A child's parents once lived in Chicago.
I wonder why he's in an orphanage now.
My friend misspelled "Mexico" and got here.
He sucked his sister's poop hole.
Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?
You must have been born on a highway because that's where most accidents happen.
A man walks in a bar. Ouchie!
I asked my mother about her mom.
She said she was in a better place. After that, I asked her where that place is. She didn't know, so I sent her to a better place.
What do you call your mom?
Basement bound.
Penis ➕ ➕ ➕ 🕳
inside 🚹 🚹 restroom
equals 😋 🍌 🍌 🍌 inside
glory 🕳
So my dad walks into a bar and there was a hooker and a child. I was with him and they both approached us and they said only £50 for head but it was a little weird that the child was talking to my dad and the hooker was talking to me. I was about to say something but my dad pushed me over and my friend's uncle killed my dad.
The kid was never seen again. Her name was Madeleine McCann. I think I'm the only one who knows where she is, but overall the head from the hooker was good.
Timmy: *grabs box of Trojans*
Daddy:...
Timmy: Well come on diddy!
Daddy: Well shit lets go son!
Both: YEE YEE
SWEET HOME ALABAMA
I like big butts in the Kent, la la "hehehe" SUS.
Where is the pocket?
It is there, the pocket.
Why do fat cows eat fat cows? Because I wrote this in America.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost.
So as they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a gun as well!"
The guy was confused but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For the France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shooting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, "Well...sh!# that didn't go as planned."