"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"
In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell.
Do you know why God created wars? To teach Americans geography.
What is the best thing about living in Switzerland? -- Well, the flag is a big plus.
Why are people in Japan always skinny?
Because last time there was a "Fat Man", a whole city disappeared.
I hate when I lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. Where do I lose my friends from Afghanistan?
In an explosion.
What's the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest.
Do you know why the Japanese have squinted eyes? Because nukes are bright.
Want my opinion on Mongolia? It has its pros and Khans.
What's the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi? -- People in Dubai don't like the Flintstones but people in Abu Dhabi doooo.
What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just WAVED. Can you SEA what I did there? I'm SHORE you did. Why are you so SALTY? Don't be a BEACH.
Why was the ocean so blue? Because the island never waved back.
How do you make someone in Africa disappointed?
Sing "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head."
What do you call a bee that lives in America? A USB.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
what is the fastest country? iran.
Nazis have marched in Melbourne. Are you sure Eric Clapton and Carrie Underwood are not touring in Australia?
Why are mountains always tired? Because they don't Everest.
If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the đ is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of đ? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.
I was sitting in a bar one day and two really large women came in, talking in an interesting accent. So I said, "Cool accent, are you two ladies from Ireland?" One of them snarled at me, "It's Wales, Dumbo!" So I corrected myself, "My apologies, so are you two whales from Ireland?"
