I called the rape advice line last night turns out its just for victims
I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a mussel.
what did the kid with luekemia watch last night? Finding Chemo
My Grandmother died last month. The thing that bugs me to this day, I couldn't understand her last words ... through the pillow.
my friend was on wheelchair......he committed suicide yesterday, I remember when i met him last time he told us a good joke and i appreciated him and i told him to become stand up comedian.
My dad died the other day but, i was able to hear his last words"son are you still holding the ladder"
I asked my wife if I could use toys during sex last night. You should've seen her face when I rolled my Hot Wheels across her tits.
What's the second to last letter in the alphabet? Y. Cause I wanted to know
What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.
Head teacher talking about recent vandalism during school assembly:
"And to those of you who wrote Mr. Smith's telephone number on the door of the girl's toilets, he would like to make it clear that the last digit is a 7 and not a 4."
My girlfriends last words I can’t wait to become a mom
I will never forget my grandfathers last words. “The fuck you doing whit that knife
billie: hi
me: you wanna hear a story?
billie: yes sure
me: once upon a time, i ran over your dog last night.
My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
I was in Alabama last year. I walked into a store and noticed a couple kissing eachother and I said excuse where is the bathroom and the man said right over there. I went into the bathroom and then heard the girl say "Dad I have to go to school soon"
I only remember my fathers last words before he died. He said, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
Last words of the captain of the Titanic.... Where's all this water come from??
How did the black woman name her 4 babies? Tyrone, Tyrone, Tyrone, and Tyrone How did she differentiate them? She called them by their last names
Q: Do you know why black people have nightmares?
A: Because we shot the last one who had a dream
Mom: Are you seriously gonna die Me : No. Don't worry. Suicide is the last thing i'll do
