Hygiene jokes

"I used to be addicted to soap, but I'm clean now."

Why do tampons have strings? So you can floss your teeth when you’re done eating.

Yo mama is so fat that a whole forest grew on her, but it was sad because she really smells, so the forest died.

Why is Fairy's washing up liquid the best form of lubricant for anal sex?

No more tears.

You should know how important it is to wash your sex toys.

That's why priests invented baptism.

When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.

I'd mop the floor with your face, but you might just mess it up more.

What did one piece of toilet paper say to the other? "I feel really wiped."

A, B, C, E, F, G. You smell like a baby. Maybe you should not be "Hati-ey."

I ain't shaking anyone's hand, not because of the Coronavirus... I ain't shaking anyone's hand because y'all out of toilet paper!

I'll put white in your smile.

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth, then it's a soap opera.

How can toilet paper decorate your house?

Shit sticks everywhere.

Two old Indian ladies out picking potatoes, one lady stops, staring at this huge potato, turning it round and round.

The other old lady says to her, "What are you doing?" She says, "These potatoes remind me of my husband's nuts."

She says, "Oh my, are they really that big?" She said, "No, they're that dirty. lololol"

You know you’re going bald when you use more toothpaste than shampoo.

Why did the priest invent baptism?

To wash their sex toys.

What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?

He wipes his butt.

A good bath is like a dead lover. You can enjoy them, that is until they get too cold.

Women are like rolls of toilet paper. They are either really cheap or expensive, you use them a lot, and they deal with a lot of sh*t.