Prevention jokes
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
Like, if you hate wearing a mask.
Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!
True story by the way.
I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.
Nothing much, I just decided to go home.
What should you do to prevent dry skin? Use a towel.
What’s the best way to make sure you don’t get COVID?
Suicide.
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
What's the #1 rule of kidnapping prevention?
Don't get carried away!
How do you stop a woman from choking?
Back up an inch.
I would try to stop rapists, but force would be an option for it.
My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.
What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never do anything to prevent?
A school shooting.
I had a dog with an eating disorder.
He wouldn’t eat any of my homework.
How can all rape be prevented? Just teach your daughters to never say no to a man. There - fixed!
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.
How do you get a depressed man out of the tree? You cut the rope.
Today we need to teach our teens about having safe sex while using contraceptives.
Condoms 99 percent effective.
Birth control 99 percent effective.
Etc.
Just be like me and use underage 7 year olds works 100 percent of the time (only cost 20 years in jail ;)
"Just say NO to drugs!" Well, if I'm talking to drugs, I probably already said yes.
What's worse than a failed attempt at suicide?
The pity looks people give you and people keep you away from 'dangerous' things.
Please stop using this thread. It is cancer.