Humor
I have no dad, no milk, and no mom, so that means no tits, like if you can relate.
If Joe Biden was on stage and he heard gunshots, he probably would’ve thought it was the ice cream truck.
The best way to tell a Hindu person and a Muslim person apart is asking them:
"Are you 7-Eleven or 9/11?"
My jokes are so dark that I am surprised that the cops didn't shoot them yet.
What do you call a Black man having a seizure?
Chocolate shake.
This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.
What do you call it when someone fucks shoe inserts?
Orthopediphilia.
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
I'd tell a bad baby joke, but I decided to abort.
What do you call a disabled kid's sweat?
VEGETABLE OIL!
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
Why did the dinosaur take a bath?
So it can get ex-stinked!
Yo forehead so big it touches yo neck.
Me: The last time I used Duolingo was when the dinosaurs went extinct.
Duolingo: Lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)
"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"
"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."
"I meant the ice cream, bro..."
Guys, stop joking about 9/11. It's just plane wrong.
Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.
The easiest time to add insult to injury is when you're signing someone's cast.
Q: What kinda bees give milk?
A: Boobees.
What do you call a group of emos?
A cutting board.