One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.

Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?

God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!

My girlfriend told me she’s sad because she’s put on a bit of weight.

I told her to keep her chins up.

When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."