Puns

Anonymous

What instrument do a pair of sheep play, The two-baaaa

Animal

Anonymous

What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate? – A candy baa.

2

Animal

Larry Dickens

what do you call a sheep on steroids? A woolly Mammoth.

Beach

Baba Lamb

What do sheep wear to the beach? A baa-kini

Roll

Anonymous

What do you call a bunch of sheep rolling down the hill? A. A lamb slide

Animal

Anonymous

What do you call shaving a crazy sheep? – Shear madness.

World

SkoopySkekFace

SHeep want to WOooll the world :)

Fruit

Anonymous

What’s a sheep’s favorite fruit?

A baaaaaaaanaaaaaana

Animal

Anonymous

Why do Scottish men wear kilts?

Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.

2

Little John

Anonymous

Teacher:what does a pig give you Little Johnny:Bacon Teacher:good,what does the sheep give you Little Johnny:Wool Teacher:What does the fat cow give you Little Johnny:homework and says leave motherf*cker

4

Puns

Anonymous

Where did the sheep get a hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.

1

Little John

Anonymous

Teacher:what does a pig give you Little Johnny:Bacon Teacher:good,what does the sheep give you Little Johnny:Wool Teacher:What does the fat cow give you Little Johnny:homework and says leave motherfucker

1

Little Johnny

koko

the teacher asked the class what sound does a cow make mooo said sally good job said the teacher what sound does a sheep make baa said jack good now what sound does a pig make little johnny raised his hand really high in the sky the teacher called him he said the pig says get on the ground and put ur hands on ur head u black moterfucker

Puns

Anonymous

You guys have very baaaaaaa-d puns

Puns

Anonymous

What’s a Sheeps Favorite Song?

Baby Don’t Herd Me.

Son

Anonymous

Dad: You’re looking pretty sheepish Son: That’s too baaaaaad

Air

Anonymous

What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud

Hell

watersharky Music Productions

Cradles-By Sub Urban and watersharky Music Productions- I live inside my own world of make-believe Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities I see the world through eyes covered in ink and bleach Cross out the ones who heard my cries and watched me weep I love everything Fire’s spreading all around my room My world’s so bright It’s hard to breathe but that’s alright Hush Shh Tape my eyes open to force reality (oh no, no) Why can’t you just let me eat my weight in glee? I live inside my own world of make-believe Kids screaming in their cradles, profanities Some days I feel skinnier than all the other days And some days I can’t tell if my body belongs to me I love everything Fire’s spreading all around my room My world’s so bright It’s hard to breathe but that’s alright Hush Shh I wanna taste your content Hold your breath and feel the tension Devils hide behind redemption Honesty is a one-way gate to hell I wanna taste consumption Breathe faster to waste oxygen Hear the children sing aloud It’s music 'til the wick burns out Hush Just wanna be care free lately, yeah Just kicking up daisies Got one too many quarters in my pockets Count 'em like the four-leaf clovers in my locket Untied laces, yeah Just tripping on daydreams Got dirty little lullabies playing on repeat Might as well just rot around the nursery and count sheep

Number

Bex

My friend asked me to round up here 37 sheep.

I said “40”

Bad

Anonymous

Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female… sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep… animals in general." Reporter: "But isn’t that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: “No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch.”

1