Humor
John
What is the difference between a kid with cancer and dark humor?
Dark humor never dies!
Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.
Your hairline is so far back, it left before your dad.
If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
Kid asks, "What is dark humor?" Me *points*, "See that guy across the street..." Kid: "I can't... I'm blind." Me: "Exactly."
Mary: If you born pikin (child) inside shop, wetin you go call that pikin (child)?
Mike: The pikin (child) go bear Bishop.
Me: So you two girls are from England?
Girls: Wales.
Me: Oh, I see, so you two whales are from England.
September 11, bring your plane to work day.
Tell an old person to pretend [they are] shaking salt in their mouth... you'll see!
How'd the skeleton know it was going to rain? He looked at the weather forecast.
What's the difference between pussy and pizza... nothing because I'll eat them both.
What does a perverted frog say? Rub it.
Why don't witches wear underwear? To get a better grip on their broom.
What do girls and rocks have in common? The flat ones get skipped.
What is red and goes 200 mph? A baby in a blender.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
"Stop telling these orphan jokes!! Maybe some people that read these are orphans!"
I'll stop telling orphan jokes when their parents come back.
I told one of my friends, "You're the reason why gene pools have lifeguards."
Why do orphans have no sense of humor?
I guess they've never heard a dad joke.
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.