Plant jokes
How can you find out how old a cabbage is?
By looking at its cabbAGE.
Here's a good tree joke to spruce up your day!
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to garden?
Lil Plant
What did the lettuce say to the carrot?
"Lettuce be friends!"
My plants in my garden are like the Twin Towers; neither of them fell, just the flowers.
If a walnut is a nut on the wall, then what is a peanut?
What's the difference between a potted plant and your wife?
The first is easier to bury.
Why did the dwarf laugh when he walked on the field?
The grass was tickling his balls.
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?
A piece of ass that makes your eyes water.
What do you call grass that grows in space?
Astro-turf.
A friend asked what an acorn is.
I said, “In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.”
Save the plants, eat a vegan.
You keep your quality beans for the right season till you realize that you planted them on the infertile land.
If my cat were a cactus, doesn't that make him the catus?
You wanna know what I have in common with an apple?
We BOTH look good hanging in a tree.
Why did the emo kid hate the tree?
It left him hanging.
A woman went into her garden and danced in front of her vegetables.
The next morning, her corn didn’t grow, and the tomatoes didn’t blush or turn red, but the cucumbers grew four inches.
What is the difference between a car and a tree?
A tree cannot drive, but a car can drive.