Humor
Why are elephants 🐘 so responsible?
Because they keep their belongings in the trunk.
I wanna tell you guys a joke about a broken pencil...
But it’s quite pointless.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
I've tried to like all of your jokes. They are funny 😆 and joshisboss, you are awesome. Keep up the good work 👍!
Why was the leper hockey game canceled?
It was because of a face-off in the corner.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
When the North Tower saw the South Tower collapse, he would say, "I'm still standing."
Is that ass a water barrier 'cause dam[n]?
Why did the dwarf get a job at Lidl?
Because every Lidl helps.
I'd make a masturbation joke.
But they always get out of hand.
What goes hahaha bonk?
A man laughing his head off.
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
Bully: I wasn't talking to you.
Me: Then why are you listening?
Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"
The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."
Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.
Roast
You have such a big forehead it has a 6 pack on it!
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
People dream about having a lot of money, but the only thing you should be dreaming about is a hairline.
Why do girls rub their eyes after they wake up in the morning? because they don't have balls to scratch.