Health jokes
What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?
Cancer.
Cancer
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
1.) What’s yellow and can’t swim?
- A bus full of children.
2.) Did you hear about the Pillsbury Dough Boy?
- He died of a yeast infection.
3.) I will never forget my grandad’s last words...
- “You’re still holding the ladder, right?”
4.) I have a fish that can breakdance...
- Only for 20 seconds though, and only once.
5.) Give a man a match and he will be warm for a few hours...
- Light a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
What’s black and blue and doesn’t like to have sex?
A rape victim!
I see how it is y’all be buying toilet paper, stocking up from the Coronavirus, but where on the symptoms does it say diarrhea? Lol, why y’all be buying toilet paper, now I am just confused.
Dark humor is like cancer, it's funnier when children get it.
Why did Joe Biden go to the hospital? Because he couldn't stop Putin.
What is the difference between eating a baby and a doughnut?
Babies are healthier.
My therapist said time heals all wounds. I stabbed him. Now we wait...
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
What do you call my sister?
Suicidal.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
Thanks for coming!
Technoblade can defeat every Minecraft player, but he still can’t defeat cancer!
Crimes in 2018: assault, murder.
Crimes in 2020: coughing in public.
My doctor called me a "psychopath." How dare he?!? He'll pay for this!
What's the motto for a pizza place that's also an abortion clinic: Your loss is our sauce.
Yo mama's so fat, she woke up on both sides of the bed.
Why didn't the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn't in it!
Why are colds such bad robbers?
Because they're so easy to catch.
What did the dentist say to the butt?
"That's the largest cavity I've ever seen!"