Steering Wheel jokes

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his dick.

The bartender asks him why.

And the pirate says:

"Argh, It's driving me nuts."

What was the last thing that crossed Princess Diana's mind?

The steering wheel.

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

Because she is a girl.

When Mother Teresa went to heaven, she was greeted by Saint Peter with a halo for her dedication to the needy. After walking around for a while, she saw Lady Diana with a bigger halo. She got angry at Lady Diana and went to Saint Peter and asked him why she had a bigger one, and Saint Peter said, "Oh, that’s not a halo, that’s a steering wheel."

Two fish were in a tank. One turned to the other and asked: "Hey, how do you drive this thing?"

I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants, and it was driving me nuts.

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his pants, a peg leg, and a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "Hey, you’ve got a steering wheel on your pants."

The pirate says, "Arrrr, I know. It’s driving me nuts."

I almost got run over by a car.

For the rest of the day I was taking the backseat as I was wheely tried.

Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?

A: Because she's a woman.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.

I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!

You're the bus driver. The bus driver picks up twenty kids, drops two, picks up eighty. Drops seven, picks up a woman with green eyes, drops off a man with blue, kicks a kid in the face, and buried his mother.

Who's the bus driver?

You will never nose [know].

Confucius say, man who runs behind car will get exhausted, but man who runs in front of car will get tired.

Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

What was Stephen Hawking's favorite childhood song? "The wheels on the chair go round and round....."

I just found out that there is a racist stereotype about Asians being bad drivers, which isn't true... but if it is, then maybe Pearl Harbor was just an accident.