Health jokes
What's the difference between an abortion clinic and a computer? Ctrl+Alt+Delete.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
What did the chef say to the skeleton?
"Bone appetit!"
My syndrome may be down, but my hopes are up!
What number is better; 46 or 47?
I don't know, ask the kid with Down syndrome.
Memes
Wade must be the fucking healthiest one here
What is the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
What did the kid with Down syndrome say to his friend?
Nothing, he had no friends.
A 98 year old man goes to bed on a one layer bed. He wakes up under it...
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
What kind of cold flu do the Japanese get? The Koflu.
My doctor said I need to lose calories, so I got a piece of paper, wrote "calories," and lit it on fire.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair?
TIMMAHHHH!
Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
What’s the hardest part of a vegetable?
The wheel.
Chuck Norris has come in contact with Covid.
Covid is now in a 14-day quarantine.
Why can't people in Africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach.
Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
I gave my friend some paper. It cut his wrists.
What do you call a disabled person who deals drugs?
A wheel dealer.