Health jokes
Why doesn't Africa have pharmacies?
Because you can't take drugs on an empty stomach.
Q: What's the difference between Terri Schiavo and a tomato?
A: A tomato isn't a vegetable.
Why do Fortnite players have such good teeth?
Because they like to floss.
Yo momma is so fat, when she caught the flesh-eating bacteria, it gave up!
Why did Timmy fall down the stairs?
Because he fell off his wheelchair.
Why did the house go to the doctor?
Because it had a window pane.
What's something similar between a clogged pipe and a pregnant woman?
You fix both with a coat hanger.
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
Technoblade should have drank milk. Would have gotten rid of all his status effects!
I went to a seafood shop.
I pulled a muscle.
The sky never changes color, but when it does, we know how your breath is increasing.
I can go to Walmart and scan my wrists. It'll say "antidepressants." ✨
My friend died from Ligma!
Ligma balls.
Why can't Oregon go to the doctor?
Because they need parents' signature.
What time are most dentist appointments? Tooth hurty.
What do a gynecologist and deaf people have in common? They both read lips.
Why didn't the teddy bear want to go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
Yo mama so fat when the doctor saw her weight on the scale he said, "I asked for your weight, not your phone number!"
Why did the man become stupid?
Cause he was suicidal, herbivorous. Ja...
When you get injured 😢
When you get injured in America 😭😭😭😭💵💵💵💵💵🏩🏩🏩