My nan coughed and threw up a lung. Now she is dead

Two atom soldiers are fighting against an army. One gets shot. He cried out, im hit! I think I’ve lost an electron! Are you sure? Asks the other. Im positive!

This one as actually physics(unlike some other joke here, ahem cough cough)

How do you know a vampire’s sick?

If he’s coffin (coughing?)

What is a box called when a cough dies in it?

A coffin

A guy walks into a bar and tells the bartender “give me 2 beers”. The bartender gives him two beers and coughs in the guys beers bottles before giving it to him. The guy says to the bartender “hey what are u doing I didn’t order for bud lights I want corona beer”. The bartender replies “ sir I gave you a mix of bud light and corona and it’s on the house everyone is drinking corona tonight”.

I did a walk walk and I had to a car and a walk home from home I did

What time is it when you get home can you walk walk home and walk walk home 🏡

Me: the man sleeped in a $200 bed i He’s hole life so why dose he need a $2,000 coughing My friend: there cheaper at Costco Me: oh shit your going to have “fun” this weekend

What did the Asian say to the Asian?