Snow White and the six Dwarfs, Sneezy was caught by covid-19 quarantine!
Recently, I've found out my wife has been cheating on me for the past 3 weeks with a baker downtown in Manhattan, New York, thinking I wouldn't find out. Irony of it all, she received a yeast infection.
What do you do when you get rid of prostate cancer?
Cell-ablate!
In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.
One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”
Why is baby shampoo the best anal lube?
No more tears.
What do you call a load of retards in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
If your girl smells like tilapia, don’t let her on top of ya.
What is the hardest thing to eat on a vegetable?
The wheelchair.
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.
Don't use Head and Shoulders, just use Head; otherwise, you'll end up in the retarded situation Stephen Hawking went through.
You know I want an ADHD cure.
When?
Squirrel!
JACK AND JILL 2.0
After Jill went down the hill to get a pill,
Jack was screaming till his voice went nil,
And Jill screamed "Chill!"
Did you hear about the person who got hit in the head with a soda can?
Good thing it was a "soft" drink!
A truck carrying Vicks VapoRub overturned on the highway. Amazingly, there was no congestion for eight hours straight.
I find it best to screw people with memory loss. I mean, what's my grandma gonna do? Describe me to the cops?
What's the best time to hang out with an Indian? When your nose is clogged.
My dad went to go buy milk, but he walks as slow as my grandmother.
My grandmother is paralyzed in the legs.
What's stiff and 6 inches long?
SIDS.
If you were a vegetable, you would be a cute-cumber.
What do you call a fat person in a wheelchair?
A broken wheelchair.
