After an intense workout, I finally have the body I've always dreamed of.
It's in my basement.
Workout Jokes
My arm: "I'M GETTING RIPPED TONIGHT!"
Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.
What is Jesus's favorite exercise?
Cross Fit.
What kind of exercise do lazy people do?
Diddly-squats.
How do you get to the Hogwarts gym?
Go through the dumbbell door.
I asked the gym trainer what type of machine I should use to get the best looking women.
He said the ATM outside.
Go on the quintillionaire morning routine now!
1. Wake up. 2. Take a shit. 3. Eat. 4. Get out of bed. 5. Have breakfast.
The guy in the wheelchair at my gym can do so many pull-ups with the wheelchair on, but I said to him, "Don't skip leg day."
Not a joke but there's nowhere else to post this, (mainly this post is for the broke people without a gym). Did you know that the body can't tell if you're using weights? So lifting weights are optional.
Some beginner workouts without weights for like really weak people:
1. Sit-ups 10 reps 2. Push-ups 20 per reps 3. Squats 10 per reps 4. Crunches 10 per reps
When you're exercising and you feel the “gush.”
No pine, no gain!
What’s an Emo’s favorite exercise?
The dead hang.
What is Jesus' favorite sport? CrossFit.
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
Like if you think oily men are hot.
What is Jesus’s Favorite Exercise?
CrossFit.
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
Why do some couples go to the gym together?
Because they want their relationship to work out.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
