Guy jokes

A guy walks into a bar, then a table, and then a chair.

A guy entered a library and wanted to get some books to read. He was searching across the books, and the librarian asked him,

Librarian: What are you looking for?

Man: I am looking for a book!

Librarian: Which book?

Man: Facebook.

Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?

I guess it really IS all in the execution.

What's the worst possible thing to be playing during the funeral of a bridge-collapse victim?

Fall Guys.

Why can’t you take an Asian guy golfing? Because you can’t drive. Every time he does, he tries to put a hole-in-one.

Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?

He got hearing aids.

I knew a guy who would always claim he had a buddy with an IQ of 1.

It turns out he was just looking in the mirror.

"Karma is the guy on the Chiefs, Coming straight home to me."

I saw two really tall guys. I walked up and said, "I didn't know we still have the Twin Towers!"

One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.

I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.

"I work with animals," a guy says to his date.

"That's so sweet," she replies. "I love a man who cares about animals. Where do you work?"

"I'm a butcher," he replies.

Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.

I just competed in a wrestling tournament. The first guy hit me harder than my dad’s belt.

Guys, I know how to stop racism. Delete the word "racism." People can't be something that doesn't exist.

Person with no arms: Even though I have no arms, I can do anything you guys can.

Me: If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏 If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. 👏👏

Person with no arms: 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?

Fruit Loops.

Your hairline retreats from your face just like all the guys that look at you.

What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?

Answer: a Carnivwhore.

The boys joking be like:

One guy: "Balls!"

All the other guys: "Hahahahaha!"

Q: A guy walks into a bar, what does he say?

A: Ow!