Government jokes
What would you call the previous president when he is having a bad day?
Donald Grump.
"Can we at least give them one credit—for abiding the traffic laws?"
Pierre Poilievre has lost the government position he had for 20 years.
Bet he wishes his mom HAD used that coat hanger.
Q. What's the Premier of Alberta's favorite sex toy? A. I don't know, but I wish it were me.
What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?
They both talk like they're on fent.
Donald Trump is a good president and not a complete moron.
Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?
What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?
You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!
Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.
Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?
John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.
People are really upset with the Trump-Biden debate.
So much so, that Chris Wallace has requested to change his name.
"Let's go Brandon!"
When it's ready for pickup today, I have to get my stimulus payment for a while, and then we'll go to bed... 🥱🥹🥺
What would be Joe Biden's name if he was an orphan? "Joe."
All hail President Trump!
What do you call a potato with a pp?
A dictator.
Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?
He was snowed in.
How can one make Death Row a little more fun?
Musical electric chairs.
Dude, what if 9/11 happened because they wanted slavery back?
During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.
Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.