Government jokes

Donald Trump is a good president and not a complete moron.

Abraham Lincoln was a good man, he jumped out the window with his dick in his hand and walked up to a group of ladies and said I'm doing my duty so why don't you give me some booty?

What happens if you mix a dick with a potato?

You get a dictator dic-dick-tator-potato!

Trump's cabinet are like panties. Some crawl up your butt, some snap under pressure, and some actually cover your butt when you need them.

Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?

John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.

What would be Joe Biden's name if he was an orphan? "Joe."

"Let's go Brandon!"

When it's ready for pickup today, I have to get my stimulus payment for a while, and then we'll go to bed... 🥱🥹🥺

What do you call a potato with a pp?

A dictator.

All hail President Trump!

Why couldn't the whistleblower leave his house?

He was snowed in.

People are really upset with the Trump-Biden debate.

So much so, that Chris Wallace has requested to change his name.

What's the difference between George Floyd and Joe Biden?

They both talk like they're on fent.

Donald Trump is gonna be the best president we have ever had.

Dude, what if 9/11 happened because they wanted slavery back?

How can one make Death Row a little more fun?

Musical electric chairs.

During the election campaign of 2012, we heard about Obama, but we thought they said Osama. So I told my friend, "Grab his gun and let's have some fun." So during one of Obama's campaigns, we both shot him to death, which lasted a while.

Then my friend said, "Let's go get piss drunk at Mavericks bar." Then on TV they talked about Obama's death, and everybody but 2 guys cheered. Then guess what, we loaded our guns and lit those 2 guys up like we did to Obama.

What's the difference between George Bush and Donald Trump?

One is into airline security, and one is into wall, turrets, and rockets.

What's the similarity between George Bush and Donald Trump?

It just doesn't work...

To all the little rude people here, fuck you. I didn't ruin this country, it was Putin!

Hello my fellow Americans, I'm playing Clash Royale for the USA clan, and two towers are already gone?