Why canβt an orphan get suspended or expelled from school? Because they need to contact parents.
What's My Favorite Thing About My Grandpa?
His life insurance...
My mom has a policy where if you kill a butterfly, no butter for a week, and if you kill a grub, no grub for a week.
She killed a cockroach today. I have some bad news for her.
Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?
Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.
What is a government mandate?
When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.
Does Lightning McQueen get life insurance or car insurance?
A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said: βFuck off, you wonβt bring it back.β
What do you call the American healthcare plan for poor people? Death.
When the teacher gives me a F on my exam
But I have a AK-47 in my backpack
*is honestly the best policy*
What is the biggest lie ever? I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions.
gun control....
Whatβs the difference between a gun and liberals? Guns only have one trigger
Food makes are proudly presenting human flesh made foods donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives T and C apply this is only in the best shops in your town or down the road or in your country 1 like = 1 family member donated cos we're saving livesππ
*A man walks into a library* Man: Hello ma'am, do you know where I can find a book on suicide? Librarian: Do you know about our return policy? Suicidal Man: ... Librarian: ... The Woman checking out a book: WHAT THE FUCK?
I have one policy and that is to not make fun of black people. Sorry jesus. You were white in the bible pictures.
π€ π π What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent? Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!!
