Go jokes

About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."

Why didn't the child go to school?

Because he died of a heroin overdose.

Why did the Twin Towers go to Uber Eats?

Because they wanted something plain.

Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."

Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."

Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."

Teacher: "*stands up*"

Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."

Jake: Can I go outside?

Mom: Did you clean your room?

Jake: No.

Mom: Then f*ck no.

Jake: Alright, bet.

(Brother named No)

A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!

You're so black, when you get near the sun, we go into a solar eclipse.

Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

All you pro-life Christian motherfuckers can go die, lol.

I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.

I left a ticket to a WNBA game on the dashboard when I went to go get the groceries.

A burglar broke in and left another one on the dashboard.

My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

I am looking for a Robert "Jamie" Weber. He is a friend of mine from 3rd grade that welcomed me as the new kid. I am currently in 6th grade going into 7th grade (summer brake).

Why did the clock go out to the gazebo? To spend some time out.

Me: What did my sister do when she dressed up as Elsa and I gave her a balloon?

You: What?

Me: She let it go, let it go!

What’s the bravest thing a man can do?

Say, “I’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.

What world record did the people in 9/11 get?

The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?

Are you going to SHOWCON?

What’s SHOWCON?

Show con these nuts.