Last night I slipped on a banana.
My friend said it was a-peeling!
I can't believe my friends. They killed themselves without me!
My friend told me I should be a stand up comedian but... I prefer sitting.
The lasagna I just cooked is for me, my friends, and family. You don't get none because your name is not on the list. You wanna know why? 'Cause you got the whole place smelling like catdog and ass.
Gwen, just take Tj as your boyfriend. Gah, just do it so he won't kill himself! Prince will be fine without you!
Tj if you don't stop trying to ruin Gwen and Prince's relationship then I will scream!!!!!!!!!!
It's some dumb faker and what point of she just wants to be your friend do not understand!
I asked my friend, "Hey, did you get a haircut?" and she said, "No." Then I'm like, "Really? Then why are you bald today?"
Ah, you wanna read a cheeseburger joke for your friends to hear.
Nah, bro, you're just going to get cheese on your burger.
What does the ocean do to its friends? It waves. (*Sorry, I wasn’t making any jokes for a while. I was getting sick of this thing.*)
I miss seeing my friends and teachers.
My friend asked for something dark and creamy. I said..... "GU KHA".
Friend: What goes up but not down?
You: Your age.
Your Friend: Bro, I'm having a movie sleepover tonight. I've invited 17 people, wanna come?
You: Yeah, but why so many people?
Your Friend: Because the DVD says only 18+ viewers.
You: Dude!!!!
I played catch with my friends, but they keep going to sleep when I throw it.
Hi, people. I really need a friend. Can someone please be my friend? Say in comments if you will.
Freshfry, my friend, please talk to me!
Riley....I...I think I wanna be more than friends.
Okay, is this the new thing, saying "Gwen" in your "joke," then people will comment and you can make more friends? If so, then I really need to be saying "Gwen" more in my "jokes or chats."
How do you be friends with a musician?
B minor.
My friend: You're ugly.
The orphanage: That's what I said to all my children.
