Support Jokes

Anonymous

When Jim was playing on his phone, my grandfather told him, “You use way too much technology!”. Jim then said, “No, YOU use too much technology!” and then Jim disconnected his grandfather’s life support.

Anonymous
in Offensive

My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “No, your generation relies too much on technology!” Then I unplugged his life support.

My Grandpa said, “Your generation relies too much on technology!” I replied, “We’ll see about that." Then I unplugged his life support.

J0K35
in Depression

Guy: My life is like a game, I should end it.

Guy 2: Is it a hard life?

Guy: Yup

Guy 2: Then you can’t kill yourself LOL

Guy 3: Hold on, I know a cheat code to finish the “game”

Once again, RIP Daniel Kyre, he actually died this day five years ago.

He attempted suicide Sep 16, and was in life support, till his parents made the tough decision of taking him off.

We will miss ya bud… (cyndagoooooooo)

OP boss
in Difference

What’s the difference between flat earthers and my grandfather? flat earthers are more disconnected from reality than my grandfather is disconnected from his life support.

1
Anonymous

My father said I’m to reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support

candied.bees

my grandfather said I was to reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

My grandad said I’m too reliant on technology, so I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

Anonymous

My grandfather says I’m too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

6
Misstiano Penaldo
in Penaldo

I was exploring a haunted mansion when I encountered a ghost named Pristiano Penaldo. He asked If I supported Burnley as he wanted to statpad against me. Luckily I pulled out my trusty Liverpool shirt and he disappeared. Shame on you Penaldo.

Kis myass

My grandfather said we rely on technology too much so I unplugged his life support. Luckily I remember his last words . “You little bastard!”

KK

You use your legs as support you count on your fingers

My grandpa said I was too reliant on technology when he saw me on my phone, I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

Gavino RoyHitty BOI
in Hospital

I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I Wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone, and it turns out he only knows Spanish so When he kept saying “Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida.” I thought he wanted water, but when I got back with the water he was asleep and now my phone was charged so I translated what he said. And it was “You unplugged my life support”, that’s when I called the doctor…

Good news is, I got one sick selfie!

kdj_THANOS
in Depression

my grandpa unplugged the AC so i unplugged his life support

Jayvin Zebari
in Roast
  1. If being ugly was a crime you would have a life sentence

  2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships

  3. There is a tree out there giving you oxegyn, and you owe that tree an apology.

  4. I don’t hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.

  5. When I saw your dad on the side walk I didn’t laugh but the sidewalk cracked up.

  6. If I had powers I would make you the dumbest person alive but it seems life already beat me to the punch.

  7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it

  8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart I’d be broke.

  9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting

  10. Were you born on a highway cuz that’s where most accidents happen

  11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya

  12. Your the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented

Morning Wood
in Fire

wood fired pizza?

hows pizza gonna pay child support now?! :O

please drop a like

Lauren

My grandfather tells me I’m too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.

Anonymous
in Puns

What do you call a fruit that argues against the position it supports?

The Devil’s advocado.