Food jokes
What country did Indians invent?
Curry-a.
Instead of walking through the door, the owner of the house broke in through the window.
When he came out, a man standing on the sidewalk walked up to him and asked why he hadn't just walked through the door. The owner responded, "I'm pollo vegetarian, and I really just wanted a bit of food."
When the man looked confused, the owner said, "Windows are nature's vending machine."
The reason why I stopped eating salads was not to be unhealthy; it was so I don't need to eat the wheelchairs along with all those fucking vegetables.
My favorite sex position is the McDonald's.
Ba da ba ba ba, I'm lovin' it!
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.
Why?
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.
Guy 1: Why is my cat so angry?
Guy 2: Because she wants to eat your big sausage.
Guy 1: Don't you?
Guy 2: Yeah, it seems delicious.
Guy 1: Mmm, so... w-wait what are you doing? I didn't think you meant the one in my lunch :< Where are you leaving #_#
**Meow...**
Guy 1: Shut up, I will never feed you this sausage. It's not for you :< -_- </3
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! XD
What's a rapper's favorite type of food?
Wrap sandwiches.
Why did the rapper get kicked out of the grocery store?
He kept dropping the BEETS!
What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy?
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
"I got that dawg in me," said the Asian men after lunch.
Your mom gave me a three course meal last night:
Starters - Foreplay
Main course - Reverse Cowgirl
Dessert - Blowy
Won't forget the side drink of an individual on individual bukkake.
Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear were having a picnic.
Fozzie said, "Do you know where Ms. Piggy is? I haven't seen her all day."
Kermit said, "I don't know, but this extra bacon cheeseburger sure tastes great."
What did the Buddhist say to the pizza delivery boy?
"Make me one with everything."
What did the sushi say to the bee?
Wa sa Bee.
Why did the egg hide?
Because it was a little chicken!
How are my sister‘s legs and peanut butter alike?\n\nThey’re both smooth and easy to spread.
Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.