I was driving with my parent and shouted its a super hero but i didnt know it was a emo kid

OK- Does anyone wanna be my Girlfriend on here? Seriously, you will have someone forever, if you need someone, I'm here. ;)

I'm in a wheelchair right so I've tried everything but one stand up

It didn't work

Why do orphans have water with cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

To Tina: hi Love, your my oldest, and dearest friend. I will love you for as long as I live: I luvv you so much, my sweetest dearest darling.

If this is offending to anyone im sorry! Hey wanna see somethin funny?!?!?! go look in ur mirror

so i walked into the kitchen and saw my mom had made cookies i stole one not noticing my mom was behind me.....so my mom said PUT THE COOKIE BACK KID!!!!and i said i wasn ́t gonna eat it and she said then she said nevermind i ́ll get you ́re father so my mom said HONEY DEAL WITH YOURE SON I ́M GOING TO THE MALL!! and my dad said son if ur not allowed to have a cookie before dinner!!so he went into his room and i heard the belt and i was going to run but i knew it would be worse so he said this will be you ́re punishment as he was getting ready to hit me i said daddy no please i wasnt gonna was not going to eat it but he said NO U WONT CHANGE MY MIND LITTLE BOY then he hit me THANK YOU FOR READING STAY HEALTHY AND STAY SAFE IN THIS TIME BYE!!! read more of my jokes they ́ll prob be around the website!!

What is it called when you hit your funny bone at night? Dark humor.


Instead of walking through the door, the owner of the house broke in through the window. When he came out, a man standing on the sidewalk walked up to him and asked why he hadn't just walked through the door. The owner responded, "I'm pollo vegetarian, and I really just wanted a bit of food." When the man looked confused, the owner said; "Windows are nature's vending machine."