Food jokes
Warning: if you don't like gummy bears, DO NOT READ.
Q: What do you call a Mexican gummy bear?
A: Delici-Oso
What do you call expired milk?
The Milky Way.
I remember the time that Gordon Ramsay did an African food episode... it was a short episode. Too bad he couldn’t find any.
Why do basketball players love cookies so much?
Because they can dunk them!
What is the healthiest fruit?
An orange 🍊—It takes Vitamin See!
Why?
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!
I have a dead fish in my lunchbox.
What's the difference between a priest and McDonald's? They both stick their meat in 10-year-old buns.
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.
What did the sushi say to the bee?
"Wasuuubi!"
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
If my boobies are fish, then am I salmon boobies? Please give generously.
What's a chair's favorite snack?
Chair-ies or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
A man once ate the left side of a person. One guy watching asked if the guy he was eating was okay. The man eating him said, "No... it's okay, he's all right now."
My "choco" is too "late" for lunch.
Why are eggs bad at puns?
They always mix up their yolks!
Why shouldn't you let a Chinese person play baseball?
'Cause they'll eat the bat!
I was crying while my dad was cutting onions in the kitchen. Onions was such a good dog.
A chicken walks into a bar.
He orders Dr. Pepper.
He then lays a good scrambled egg.
Me: Do you take milk before cereal, or cereal before milk?
The adult person I asked: Cereal?
Me: I take the bowl first! What do you do? Do you just pour everything on the table and then eat it?
The person: Yes.
Me: WHAT?!!!??!!