My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high...
What is a cow's favorite party game?
Moo-sical chairs!
What does a cow watch?
MooTube.
What do you call a cow that's had an abortion?
De-calf-inated.
"Déjà moo": The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
What do you call a united cow?
United Steaks.
A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull.
The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram."
She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable."
Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"
What did the cow say?
Moo!
What does a cow say? Moo.
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
Why was the calf afraid?
Because she was a cow-herd.
How do you see the difference between a cow and a bull? It’s either one or the udder.
What kind of udder likes McDonald's?
Udderly unhealthy.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
What do you call a calf that is in no way brave?
A coward.
Why did the cow wiggle?
To make milkshake! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
What do you call a cow's facial hair?
A moostache.
What do you call a field of masturbating cattle? Beef strokin' off
A cowboy rides into a ranch on Sunday, stays three days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible?
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
