Food jokes

Why were the people in the Twin Towers sad?

They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.

I walked in a sushi bar, and the sushi chef looked very o-fish-all!

Julius Caesar is Roman? More like romaine (salad), and to make the best salad, you stab it 23 times until the Caesar salad, romaine salad, is fresh.

What do you call a broken chicken?

A broken chicken.

What happens when you eat salmon with Nutella?

You get salmonella.

If you’re forced to have it as a child, you won’t like it as an adult.

I guess Hitler was forced to have vegetables when he was younger.

Ice cold coffee? Cool beans!

Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.

McDonald's :)

You're at a buffet, you think you're hungry for two, but misfortune happens when you think of yourself. You get stuck looking at sides in the buffet. A roly poly gal you see in the corner of your eye, eyeballing the main dishes in front at the end. You go in for the pickings, you get intercepted by a far more hungrier matter, but you find yourself getting slammed over the buffet table, and realize you are gasping for air, and she is tenderizing you for dinner.

What did the cannibal get when he showed up to the party late?

A cold shoulder.

A wife and husband had been on a strict diet, and the wife said, "You know, we've been good about our diet. Let's have a cheat night tonight." The wife came home with KFC and Wendy's. The husband came home with Sylvia from the office.

You're the sriracha to my hoisin sauce.

And together, we are pho-ever.

What did the meditating egg say?

A) Ommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmlet!

I stepped on a cornflake. They accused me of being a serial killer.

There was a dude. He had a mondo dong.

His wife was like, "Yo, where are your balls?"

The dude says he left them in the fridge. His wife replies, "I knew those meatballs tasted weird!"

I saw a piece of cheese and it told me a joke, but the joke was too cheesy.

What do you call an abortion in a bathtub?

Chunky Tomato Soup.

I saw a bear eating a duck.

It was unBEARable.

what do you call a baby in an oven?

my next meal.