You walk into a McDonald's and you ask for some extra mayo, and they put too much on there.
I say I didn't order a "McCumshot."
McDonald's Jokes
Why can't orphans play at a McDonald's play place? They don't have parent supervision.
McDonald's was originally called "Mac and Dick," so, if you think about it, you could be enjoying a Big Dick instead of a Big Mac.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
Nothing... They both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's logo!
Is your body from McDonald's, because I'm loving it?
Despite Michael Jackson’s legal problems while he was alive, McDonald’s is still going to honor his life achievements in the music industry by naming a sandwich after him.
They’re going to call it the McMichael! It’s going to be a fifty year old piece of meat pressed between two eight year old buns.
Your hairline shape is so badly shaped like a M, me and my friends thought it was McDonald's.
Did you know that McDonald's made a Michael Jackson burger? It’s a 50-year-old piece of meat in a 12-year-old bun.
Man: "Is your body from McDonald's?"
Woman: "Why, because you're loving it?"
Man: "No, because it's fat and greasy."
Your hairline looks like the McDonald's sign M.
What place can you always find suicidal cows at?
"McDonald's."
Why can't orphans work at McDonald's? Because they call their employees family.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
What's the fastest thing on earth?
An Ethiopian with a McDonald's Voucher.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
nothing... they both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
Your momma's so fat she started "Fat Lives Matter". Meetings are everyday:
11 o'clock McDonald's, 12 o'clock KFC, 1 o'clock Pizza Hut.
Life is like a McDonald's meal; it only lasts 7 seconds for fat people.
Let's play pretend. I'll be Nike and you'll be McDonald's, cuz I'll be doin' it and you'll be lovin' it.
Imagine someone leaving a cut-out of Jeff Bezos on your car after you found out your blind bf cheated on you, and the McDonald's employee says over the speaker, "Weren't expecting him to see other hoes were you?"