Fat

Fat jokes

Mom

Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.

Size

If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.

Mama

Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the TV, I missed a whole season of SpongeBob.

Weight

You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."

Memes

Homework

What does a chicken give you?

Student: Meat.

What does a pig give you?

Student: Bacon.

What does a fat cow give you?

Student: Homework.

Mama

Yo mama so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," He was just asking her to move.

Skeleton

A funny joke scenario.

Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.

Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.

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  • Land

    Her: "Land of the free".

    Me: *fat*

    Her: What do you mean?

    Me: It's not fat-free.

    Calorie

    My doctor said I need to lose calories, so I got a piece of paper, wrote "calories," and lit it on fire.

    Water Bed

    You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.

    Earth

    Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?

    Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.

    Yo mama

    Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.

    Mom

    Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"

    Dad

    Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.