Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
Yo mama so fat, when she passed by the TV, I missed a whole season of SpongeBob.
You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."
What does a chicken give you?
Student: Meat.
What does a pig give you?
Student: Bacon.
What does a fat cow give you?
Student: Homework.
Yo mama so fat, when God said, "Let there be light," He was just asking her to move.
A funny joke scenario.
Person 1: Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance?
Person 2: Because he had no "body" to go with.
Person 1: Because he was ugly, fat, and nobody liked him.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
My doctor said I need to lose calories, so I got a piece of paper, wrote "calories," and lit it on fire.
You went to the bed store asking for a water bed. They put a pillow and sheets on the ocean.
Science teacher: How many times can the earth fit into the sun?
Me: As many times as the earth can fit into you.
Yo mamma so fat, scientists say she's the closest planet to Earth!
Yo mama so fat that when she went out in high heels, she came back in flip flops.
You're so fat, the only thing you could be for Halloween is the Kool-Aid Man.
Your mom is so fat that when she went on the scale, it said, "I need your weight, not your phone number!"
Yo mama is so fat, a picture of her would fall off the wall.
Alex Stokes says, "Kat, I've seen you eat many foods!"
Yo mama's so fat, she invented double doors!
Your dad is so fat that when he walks past the TV, I miss three episodes of South Park.