Eating jokes
A: Why did Sally fall off the swing?
B: Why?
A: Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Not Sally.
Joe was eating ice cream while walking on the street. He dropped his ice cream. Why?
B: I don't know, why?
A: Because Sally was driving the car.
Adin, you should consider eating pencil lead, you fat cat lover, only if you're the new Adin from FF though xoxo da babby.
How does a train eat?
"Chew chew!"
What plate do you need to eat in a car? A license plate!
What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?
If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.
I was on a website doing homework, and there was this funny a** commercial banner saying: "Eat a bag of Dick's!" It was the funniest sh*t ever!
Do they say you are what you eat?
That makes Bulma a VEGETARIAN if u know what I'm SAIYAN.
What is something that makes you wish you were dead, rips your skin off, is small, can wear you out in two seconds, betray you in any way possible, and can eat you alive?
Kid's.
Anyone want a free pizza? Because you liking a pizza with toppings that not many people enjoy allows you to eat the entire guilt free pizza, that they said they didn't want and everyone already offered you a slice of.
Hey paps, BONE-appetit!
(Just eat your spaguetti.)
A monkey eats cheese. He was lactose intolerant.
Yo mama so tall, she eats paramedics.
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
"I know, you have a lot on your plate right now."
I asked my teacher if I needed to be in the special ED class, but she said I don’t eat enough vegetables.
Why did the robot eat a lightbulb?
'Cause he was in need of a light snack!
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
Why does the paper follow up with wine because it was junk? Do wrong, so wrong that you don’t even exist because nobody even eats it. Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Haha ha ha! Haha ha haha ha ha! Ha hah hah hah ha!
Vince Li doesn't eat comedians. He says they taste funny.