Eating jokes
What is a cannibal's favorite place to eat?
Five Guys.
This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.
Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.
Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"
Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.
Why don’t I shut myself all the time?
I can only fit so many pairs of kids in my mouth and stomach at the same time.
Why do people eat food?
Coz it tastes good lol.
When you want Pringles, but a fat person was eating them, there were only three left, sweety.
My friend called me a dick earlier. I said, "You are what you eat." He then proceeded to run away from me.
What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?
Open wide, here comes the plane!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To eat Bob's arms.
Bob went to hospital and had no arms.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Bob.
Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.
His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”
Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”
I have an addiction to cheddar cheese, but it's only mild.
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.
Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.
Why are kids so skinny?
Parents eat all the food themselves, and let the kids starve.
What did the seal say to the shark?
"Are you seal-iously going to eat me?"
Your mum eats cabbage.
Why can’t blind people eat fish? Because it’s sea food.
My three favorite things are eating my family, and not using commas.
"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"
"He died."
"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."
(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"
A man walks into a pharmacy and buys multiple containers of Tylenol, and the clerk asks why he's buying all of these. He replies with, "I'm playing 1 pill eat 100."