Just watched my friend take a steak out of her pocket. That steak was so outta pocket.
Eating Jokes
Nah, they eat emo meals.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.
Why did Jeffery Dahmer not eat old people?
He does not like roasted vegetables.
Are you Jeffrey Dahmer? Because I'd love you to eat me.
Person 1: Goodness, when is Michael Jackson going to stop eating these white chocolate truffles? He is already making a goddamn mess on his bed eating a few of them.
Person 2: Well, he cannot resist the little white balls.
Why did the transgender man only eat salad?
Because he was a "her" before.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common?
They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)
I live in China and we have no food. We have to eat Chinese food, so I called my dog over.
Why are fat people fat? Because they eat like Indians eating curry, except fat people eat many more portions.
doctor: you need to eat healthy.
me: no.
doctor: the last patient who didn't change their diet after I suggested it died.
me: oh my goodness.
doctor: in a plane crash.
me: that sounds unrelated.
doctor: I'm the one that crashed it. Do not disobey me!
What kind of food does a lesbian love? Anything they can eat out.
You're so skinny you're a thin stick.
You're so fat that when you got in Pacific Ocean, you became the Pacific Ocean.
You're so ugly you got stuff for free.
You're so nasty that when you eat spaghetti, you thought it was throw up.
You're so fat you're the fattest person on Earth.
You are so gay you kissed the boy last night.
There is a kid in my school who is exactly like Dahmer, but he doesn't eat ppl. Or does he...?
He's Dahmer's son @domink.
[being buried alive]
Murderer: *out of breath* How are you eating the dirt so quickly?
Why does the retard not like eating his vegetables? Because he knows not to be a cannibal, he knows somehow.
Don’t like this post, or else I will go to your house and eat you! 😈
Why would a cannibal stop eating people?
If they got fed up with them.
If you are depressed, eat Panera Bread. It is so yummy yum yyum yum yum yum.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Feliz Navidad Prospero Ano y Felicidad.
I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas I wanna wish you a Merry Christmas From the bottom of my heart.
