Drug jokes
Yo mama so short, when she tried sniffing cocaine, she couldn’t get high.
What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD?
A trip without kids.
What do you call a chair that smokes weed?
A high chair.
What do you call a best friend that smokes weed?
A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?
Today, I saw my friend go crazy eating her ham sandwich. When she went to the bathroom, I checked inside her ham sandwich, and there were fresh drugs.
What do you call a couple Mexicans getting stoned in a bush? Buches baked breans.
How many crack heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, there is no electricity.
Why can't Juice WRLD hit rock bottom?
Because he's too high.
I have tried coke; it is not my cup of tea.
Why do crack heads like to do it doggy style?
So one can peep out window and one can peep on floor.
What does Michael Jackson get high on? A little crack.
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
Yo mama so short that when she tried to sniff meth, she couldn’t get high.
Where are crackheads from?
OHIGHo
If you have an overdose on a drug and die, then half of the least dose would be a lifetime supply.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.
Know your ABCs! Assholes, bitches, and cocaine!
In Pharmacology, all drugs have two names. For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of Acetaminophen. Aleve is also called Naproxen. Amoxil is also called Amoxicillin and Advil is also called Ibuprofen.
The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin. Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Midixadrupin, Midixarizin or Dixafix.
What’s the difference between a Hispanic and a stoner?
A stoner has papers.
If sugar is a drug, does that mean putting it in coffee is overdose?