Drug jokes
What’s the last balloon George Floyd blew up? His heroin balloon.
If George Floyd was in the new Little Mermaid: Under da knee Under da knee Counterfeit 20 Drugs I took plenty Now I can’t breathe
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to start to build the still for Jill.
Jack stopped and said to drunkin' Jill, "To build this still will take so long."
Jill said to Jack, "Well, f--k the still and kiss my ass, and watch me take another pill!"
What was David Bowie’s last hit?
Probably heroin.
Memes
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
Am I funny now? Because this is what you brainlets find funny.
I wanna see Stephen Hawking on nitrous.
Know your ABCs! Assholes, bitches, and cocaine!
Rapboat has to drug his own drink to get laid.
Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.
Read this:
Crack
What did you think of? A window crack or the drug?
What do you call a best friend that smokes weed?
A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched her thigh and said, "Do you wanna?" Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and they had some fun.
But silly Jill forgot her pills, and so they had a son.
Why did the rapper smoke dope?
To learn how to drop some DOPE beats!
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
*having sex on lexapro*
Her: Cum for me, baby!
Me: I'm trying!
I always say no to drugs, but considering that I'm talking to them right now, I probably already said yes.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
'Cause he was on crack.
How's George Floyd doing these days? Being drug-free for a year, he must be feeling pretty swell.
George Floyd: 3 years sober, drug and alcohol free.