Drug

Drug jokes

Rape

Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.

Am I funny now? Because this is what you brainlets find funny.

Misfortune

Heyyy, in the last six months, [I had] 4 suicide attempts, broke up with 3 girls, and my mom went on drugs.

Friend

What do you call a best friend that smokes weed?

A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?

Marijuana

Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and touched her thigh and said, "Do you wanna?" Jill said yes and pulled up her dress and they had some fun.

But silly Jill forgot her pills, and so they had a son.

Health

I always say no to drugs, but considering that I'm talking to them right now, I probably already said yes.

Sex

*having sex on lexapro*

Her: Cum for me, baby!

Me: I'm trying!

Rapper

Why did the rapper smoke dope?

To learn how to drop some DOPE beats!

Mama

Yo mama so stupid, she brought weed to the highway. Then she realized, "I'm not stupid, I was just high as a bitch." She just got fucked so hard by her man, she thought she was high.

Edible

Someone was crushing a bag of chips. I said, "Are you making edibles?"

Health

Ralphie: They put drugs in our medication?

Me: The medication is the drugs.

Jack

JACK smoked some shit in the casino bathroom.

Then fucked a slut, played some slots, took some shots, then shot a JOKER!

It's a sad story, because JACK killed himself, but he died with a smile.