Extra

Extra Jokes

Epilepsy

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I'll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

Factory

I've just been fired from the clock-making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

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  • Sauce

    What happens when you make an asĂ­an girl squirt?

    She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.

    Mayo

    You walk into a McDonald's and you ask for some extra mayo, and they put too much on there.

    I say I didn't order a "McCumshot."

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  • Santa Claus

    What is worse to have - a dead baby or a dead Santa Claus?

    Santa. You need extra freezers for reindeer.

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  • Phone

    A cell phone in an upscale gym locker room in NYC rings and the man puts it on loud speaker next to him. Everyone else in the room stops to listen:

    Man: Hello? Woman: Hi honey, it's me. Are you at the club? Man: Yes. Woman: I’m out shopping and found a beautiful leather coat. It’s only $2,000 – is it OK if I buy it? Man: Sure, go ahead if you like it that much. Woman: I also stopped by that new Lexus dealership and saw one of the new models I really like – it’s on an opening special. Man: How much? Woman: $90,000. Man: Wow! OK, but for that price I want it with all the options. Woman: Great! Oh, and one more thing... I was just talking to Jamie and found out that the house we wanted to buy last year is back on the market... they’re asking $980,000 for it. Remember it was well over a million when we looked at it? Man: I dunno. Make an offer for $900,000 and they’ll probably take it. If not, we can go the extra $80,000 if that’s what you really want. Woman: OK. I’ll see you later! I love you so much! Man: I love you to.

    The man hangs up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open.

    The man turns around and says: “Anyone know whose phone this is?”

    Father

    Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?

    In case they get a hole in one!

    Pizza

    A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.

    The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."

    Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."

    So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"

    The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"

    The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"

  • 0
  • Shooter

    Why did the school shooter earn extra points?

    Because he was on a kill streak.

    Coffee

    Whenever I order coffee, I always get the depresso with extra depresso sauce.

    Hotel

    My hotel tried to charge me ten dollars extra for air conditioning. That wasn’t cool.

    Squirt

    What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?

    She charges you for extra sauce!

    Cashier

    The cashier asked if I wanted to give my extra dollar to the poor. I said sure, and I got a Cash App notification for $1.

    Movie

    I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.

    (Extra Cholesterol)