I was addicted to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around.
A doctor is telling three women what they are addicted to. He says to the first one "You are addicted to money, you named your daughter Penny" He says to the second one "You are addicted to food, you named you daughter Candy" Then the third one whispers to her son “Come on Dick, lets go.”
If I was addicted to masturbation, and then became addicted to sex, would it be safe to say that my addiction got out of hand?
Did y’all hear about the increasing divorce rate because people are addicted to Fortnite? They’re just two week to quit.
There was a little boy named Chris who was addicted Roblox. One day, his grandpa fell into a deep coma caused by a head injury. One day, little Chris went to visit his poor grandpa. He brought his Windows 10 too, but it had no charge in it. After pulling out some wires and placing his into the wall, he started to hear a long beeping sound, but ignore it and continued to play Roblox. Chris’s parents came and saw what had happened. The dad then yelled, “You dumb f***, you killed my father!!!” Then Chris said "Yeah. He was worth robucks, too.
Johnny Johnny? Yes pa pa Eating Sugar? Yes pa pa, I am eating sugar because it is the only thing i can reach and you have refused to feed me for the past 3 days. You smoke 2 packs of cigs a day and you’re mad at me for eating a little sugar. Smoking? Telling lies? Yes pa pa, you do all of those things because you’re a chronic addict.
You: Say “addicted” after everything I say. Person: Uh okay. You: When you’re obsessed with candy you are…? Person: Addicted. You: When you’re obsessed with drugs you are…? Person: Addicted. You: What hit you in the face last night? Person: Addicted… laughs (It’s supposed to sound like “A dick did”)
Horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks “why the long face?”. The horse replies saying “My wife just died of cancer, and my alcohol addiction is tearing my family apart.” The bartender responds saying “oh” sympathetically. “sucks to be you!” The bartender yells, throwing a bottle of wine at the horse.