Dating jokes
I hate when my brother dates other people.
Just kidding! 😵😵😵😵
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Gwen: Hi sir, how are you?
Tj: Good... you?
Gwen: I am super duper good! And where is your date? It seems like you need one 😉!
Tj: 😏.
Gwen: Here, this is your guest hall pass...you may...come in my friend!
Tj: Thanks but um, don't you think you should be um getting inside too?
Gwen: 🙁 No thanks sir but I have to work...I am the staff so bye! 😁.
Tj: NO!!!!!!
1 day later.
Gwen: 🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤕🤰🤰🤰👩👧👦
Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party?
He had nobody to go with.
What's the best part of dating a homeless girl? You can drop her off anywhere.
One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
Where does a cow take his date?
Answer: To the moooooovies!
What's the difference between a hoe and a sidechick? The hoe want different meals, the sidechick always gone be that one crumb on the side of the plate for debate 💯.
I was going on a date when I decided to put on Penaldo’s PR7 cologne to smell good. As I put on the cologne, my skin started to turn invisible!
I then realized the cologne had made me turn into a ghost 👻. Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my date 😡!
I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after, I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat.
She said nothing, so I took her to Africa.
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
Girl: "Hey, why don't you come over?"
Guy: "I can't. Cops are looking for me, they say I killed 2 people."
Girl: "C'mon, my parents aren't home."
Guy: "About that..."
I have to file a complaint against Spotify because I didn’t see you on my hot singles last week.
There are plenty more fish in the sea is the last thing you should say to a necrophiliac.
I like my women the way I like my coffee, and I don't drink coffee.
Roses are red. Violets are blue. If he's busy on Valentine's Day, the side chick is you.
Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.