Crime

Crime jokes

Lock

Knowing how to pick locks has really opened a lot of doors for me.

Song

What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?

"Just Beat It."

Memes

Toy

What's Michael Jackson's favorite toy?

Wet 6-year-old balls.

Direction

I tried to stick to One Direction, but then they started to shoot the gay bar...

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  • Paedophile

    What does McDonald's and a paedophile have in common?

    They both like sticking their meat in ten-year-olds.

    House

    I was invited into a celebrity's house, that's what I told the cops at least...

    Shot

    Person: So you know that person's name you say when you make a hoop, well he's dead.

    Friend: Yeah, John Wilkes Booth.

    Person: How dare you say that he killed Abraham Lincoln?

    Friend: Terrible guy but he never missed a shot!

    Coke

    I snorted a line of coke off my 8-year-old sister’s tiny prepubescent vag. She just laid there and let me do it without complaining, probably because she was already dead.

    Kid

    What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?

    They both have a touchy feeling for kids.