Skin

Skin Jokes

Banana

What do you call a weak, beta, tall and dumb kid? A banana.

But if you're vegan, you call him food.

If you're poor, you eat the skin.

Rose

ok this isn't a joke but it's funny.

Roses are red, nuts are brown, Skirts go up, pants go down. Body to body, skin to skin, when it's stiff, stick it in. It goes in dry, comes out wet, the longer it's in, the stronger it gets. It comes out dripping and starts to sag, It's not what you think, it's a lipton tea bag.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Donald Trump

Donald Trump is proud of being white, which is strange, considering he's orange. Makes you wonder why he didn't pull a Michael Jackson and bleach his own skin....

Michael Jackson

Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park in his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.

Vein

Why do self-harmers "draw" on their arms?

Because everything they do is in vein.

Punchline: "Vain" sounds similar to "Vein".

Sunburn

The people in Florida yelling "White Power!" is amusing, because when they get permanent sunburn from the Florida sun, they are not white anymore.

Chess

Why can Michael Jackson not play chess? Because he can't pick which side he is on, the white or black side.

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  • Consideration

    After long consideration, I've decided to get a zebra tattoo on my wrist. Not like anyone will notice the difference.

    Self Harm

    If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)

    Date

    I was going on a date when I decided to put on Penaldo’s PR7 cologne to smell good. As I put on the cologne, my skin started to turn invisible!

    I then realized the cologne had made me turn into a ghost 👻. Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my date 😡!

    Tattoo

    I now know what my first tattoo should be, zebra stripes! Not like anyone would know the difference between them.

    Victim

    Serial murderer Ed Gein was famed for raping, killing, and skinning his victims.

    When he was asked why he did it, he responded, "You don't know someone until you walk around in their skin."

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