Homicide jokes

What do you get when you have an annoying kid, a homicidal kid, and a suicidal kid in the same room? A happy ending.

- The emo went to give the tree a high five, but the emo was left hanging.

- How did the gay person die? Homicide.

- Why did the emo get kicked out of the amusement park? He was cutting in line.

- When does a joke turn into a dad joke? When it leaves and never comes back.

- I cried when my dad chopped onions. Onions was such a good dog.

- I have happy memories building sandcastles with my dad, until my mom took his urn away.

- How is the person over there different from cancer? His dad didn't beat cancer.

How did the gay girl die? Homicide.

"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"

How did the lesbian die? Homicide.

"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"

How did the gay man die? Homicide.

I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.

Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"

Please don't kill [me].

They say there's a person capable of murder in every friendship group. I suspected it was Dave, so I killed him before he could cause any harm.

I've been looking for my ex-girlfriend's killer for the past two years.

But no one would do it.

If you push someone that's bullying, if you kill someone that's murder, if there is no evidence it's nothing.

If a person shoots a person about to commit suicide, is it making it less painful, or is it murder?

Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.