Car jokes
Your hairline is so far back that I can't even back out of my car.
I didn’t know how to fasten my seatbelt. Then it clicked.
What's the difference between a speed bump and a road kill?
About 40 mph.
Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?
So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.
My dad said he'd get the milk, but he forgot I was in his car.
Memes
Why do the brakes keep squealing?
Because the driver hit it too hard.
Your hairline reminds me of a car taking a U-turn.
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Someone complimented me on my driving last week. They left a note saying, "Parking Fine!"
Your mamma is so fat that she saved me a lot of money by sitting in my car when I wanted to buy a low rider.
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
What goes boo in a car with no lips?
What does a car have when it's very itchy?
A road rash.
When are you from Iowa? You know!!! 🚗
What’s the difference between orphans and cars?
I don’t have 1080 cars in my basement.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
Teach a Scouser to fish and he can eat for a day.
Give him the rod and he will stick it in your letterbox and nick your car keys!