Can

Can jokes

Trash Can

How do you make a trash can leak?

Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!

Mama

Your mama is so stupid she stayed up all night so she can get some sleep.

Woman

A blind woman told her husband someone is coming. He asks how do you know, you can't see. She replies, "I can taste it."

Memes

Dagger

For some unexplainable reason I instantly though “hmm this sounds like something for dagger”

An image of a knight in full armor with a text overlay that reads "Here we can see two men eager to reclaim the holy land, staring at each other."

Bee

My friend asked me if bees can fly in the rain. I replied, "Not without their yellow jackets!"

Period

Period: Guess who’s back... back again...

Me: Ugh, can we not do this today?

Period: I can come back in 9 months?

Me: Keep fucking singing.

Trash Can

"Can I throw you away? You look like my trash can. Oh, wait, you *are* my trash can."

Gun

When the guy came in with a gun to rob the store, I said: "Hey, can I borrow that?"

He says "yes." Me, over here, walking to the cashier and saying: "Goodbye!" He screams: "Have mercy!"

I say: "No, not to you, to me. Say goodbye." He says: "No, don't shoot yourself!" It was too late.

Tree

Once in 4th grade, right now, I told a random tree, "Hey, my day is bad right now, can we hang later?"

The tree said: "Yeah, we are going to be hanging every day :) !!! If you can last :)"

Orphan

Why do orphans never use other people's Wi-Fi?

So they can be connected.

Earring

When you don't wear earrings for a long time, the hole can close, and it hurts so much when you want to put it back. 🙄🙄 😁😁😁🤣

Abortion

People go to places to see Harry Potter live, but you can just go to the abortion place and see something disappear.

Victim

Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers?

They can go through 100 floors in 7 seconds.