Dad I'm hungry hi hungry I'm dad 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
stranger. do you want a lollipop. kid. no i hate lolipops so yeah and you are not my daddy.
What do you call a rooster lollipop? A cock sucker!
Three men are travelling through the desert when their single camel dies. They walk for a while but then it becomes night. Desperate for shelter, suddenly they stumble across a tent and inside is three beautiful women. The men were not only lost but horny too so they begin to have sex with the women. But the tent belongs to a prince and these three women were his wives so he is very angry when he arrives an hour later and sees three strangers having sex with his wives. He tells the three men he will chop off their penises as punishment, in some way relating to their job. He asks the first man what his job is: The guy says, "I'm a fireman" The prince says, "Then we'll burn your dick off!" The second guy says, "I'm an employee at the shooting range" The prince says, "Then we'll shoot your dick off!" The third guy smiles and says, "I'm a lollipop salesman
Q: What is the worst thing to hear your surgeon say?
A: Oops I dropped my lollipop.
What did the dad say when he left the lollipop stores? "Cya suckers🍭"
What’s the similarity between a penis and a lollipop?
Kids can take both
Your hairline is like a lollipop because every time someone licks it it gets shorter
I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen it's only people who are skinny but the fat people can't have none all they do is suck it up like a lollipop.
“The truest things ARE the funniest things.” -Lollipop from JacknJellify, the BFDI series.
Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day. Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first. Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am. Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet. Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you. Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you. Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down. Most restaurants are closed at night.. but your legs aren’t. I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out. Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight. Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall. I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately... but I hope it’s you. Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream. Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you. Do you sing in the shower? Because if so I need a private ticket of your concert. Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between. Are you a blanket? Because your on top of me every night. Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7. Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream. I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not. Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down. Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up. Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.
Earnie and Burt were camping in the woods, when they woke up Burt asked Earnie "how did you sleep?" Earnie replied with "I slept amazing I had a great dream that I was in a magic candy world and was sucking the most tastiest lollipop I'd ever tasted in my life." Burt replied with "good to hear, I slept amazing too, I had a dream that I was in heaven surround by angels, and one of them was giving me a blow job."
My childhood tormentor was at school. I walked through so I could get to class. And then he said, "Hey you donkey." I said, "Thank you, I'm so happy that I'm something, not nothing like you. And I gave him a pink lollipop. He walked off. And I became popular. Or should I say, Lolli-Popular. Sorry
