Bomb jokes
Why do I look nervous when I enter the church? Is it just because I'm the only one with the bomb?
HELP! I MIGHT BE A RELIGIOUS EXTREMIST BECAUSE MY RHYMES ARE DA BOMB.
Famous last words of my uncle, (a bomb disposal expert): "yes, the red wire."
I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"
Are you a lollipop? Because I can suck on you all day.
Are you an Oreo? Because I eat the cream first.
Are you a microwave? Because I’m trying to keep you quiet at 3:00 am.
Are you a sprinkler? Cause every time I see you I get wet.
Are you makeup? Cause I’d spend hours doing you.
Are you a guitar? Because I’d love to hear the noises you make when I play with you.
Are you an elevator? Cause I wanna ride you up and down.
Most restaurants are closed at night, but your legs aren’t.
I’m not a cashier, but you got a couple of things I wanna check out.
Are you Cinderella? Because I can see that dress coming off at midnight.
Are you a calendar? Because I want to pin you against the wall.
I don’t know what’s gotten into me lately, but I hope it’s you.
Are you a doughnut? Cause I wanna fill you with cream.
Are you a garden? Cause I want to plant some seeds inside of you.
Do you sing in the shower? Because if so, I need a private ticket of your concert.
Are your legs the twin towers? Because I’ll bomb what’s in between.
Are you a blanket? Because you’re on top of me every night.
Are you a phone? Cause I like to be on you 24/7.
Are you a roller coaster? Because the faster you go, the louder I scream.
I’m so jealous of your heart right now because it’s pounding inside of you and I’m not.
Are you a popsicle? Cause all I want to do is lick you up and down.
Are you a construction worker? Because you got me all bricked up.
Are you a fireman? Because you came in hot and left me wet.
What's the worst thing to happen to a Japanese person in WW2... being drafted as a kamikaze pilot, or existing with a Fat Man or Little Boy?
Where did Sarah go after the bombing?
Everywhere. 💀
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Fuck.
Fuck who?
Fuck off!
My life is like a grenade... I pull off the ring and, BOOM, it explodes!
Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally...
How did she die?
A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A bomb.
I was in a terrorist a famous terrorist group. No, not the Taliban. We called ourselves the Talabam.
OKAYYYY guys, today we're going to make DIY bath bombs. I bet y'all already have the first ingredient right here in your kitchen:
*looks at toaster*
Bomb.
What did the fat man say as he entered Nagasaki?
Nothing, he just exploded.
Roses are red, your cities are gone, I am Thomas the thermonuclear bomb.
What do you call a Muslim with Tourette’s? A ticcing time bomb.
You must be from Pearl Harbor, 'cause baby, you're the bomb!
I woke up today, and my mom said it was 1940.
We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.
I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.
Whenever you see an orphan taking a selfie, photo bomb him and say, "Family photo!"