Accident jokes

My friend's mom died, and he also died in a crash.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

'Cause it got knocked down on its way.

Suck on a finger, once bite it off, taste it, put some ketchup on it, wait, I'm making a mess, I bit it off!

I had bullies behind me on the street, but they were too fat and slow, so they got ran over by a truck that represents fat and slow.

Johnathon

Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.

Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.

A twin engine has two engines.

If one engine stops, the other will have just enough power to get the plane to the scene of the accident.

Dad: My kid just said "butch," but since he is a kid, he said a bad word on accident.

*The next day*

Uncle: F*CK!

I know a little girl who once had an accident. When I asked her what her favorite song was, she responded with "🎶Head, shoulders, wheels, and frame! Wheels and frame!🎶"

What’s yellow and can’t swim? A bus full of children.

My dad had a very unfortunate accident with his death. I clearly asked for Jammy Dodgers and got Bourbons!

What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?

They always line up.

What was the last thing to go through Princess Diana’s head before she died?

The steering wheel.

Why did Diana cross the road? Because she wasn't wearing a seatbelt.

Why did the blind man get killed? Because he never saw it coming.

So, I accidentally just tipped over my paralyzed sister.

Q. Why did the boy fall off his bike?

A. His mom threw an oven at him.

@ Kobe the person under my joke, your hairline is so bad that Kobe Bryant could've lived if he landed the helicopter on your forehead.

I was falling down the stairs at my local clock tower.

I somehow broke more than 206. I broke 342!

Why did the parachute refuse to open?

Because it had a "fatal attraction" to the ground.